Acceptance

Spending a bit of time thinking about my blog yesterday. It's easy to focus on the places and events that make us feel squeamish in life, where we feel we just don't fit in for whatever reason. We don't have the right clothes, the right life style, the right thoughts, we're too different, we don't have enough money etc. There are plenty of these places in life. That feeling of not being enough is often more of an internalized thing than a reality. True shunnings are thankfully rare once out of high school. Yet, our self inflicted feelings of displacement linger and nag until we overcome them or flee the place causing our distress. But, what about the people and places that accept us? The people and places that make it easy for us. Blissful? Once and a while I feel the need for an outpouring of gratitude and this is one of those days.

I have a friend that listens and accepts me quirks and all. I can't seem to freak him out. I can just be me. He sees all that I am and builds me up. Makes me believe I'm wonderful, beautiful, creative, intelligent and awesome. That's a tremendous thing. To be encouraged and accepted for who you are. To have someone support you. That doesn't put your choices in life down, even though others have. Is instead there for you in what way they can be. It's more like a dream of friendship. Only, I am blessed to have this dream be real. It's more than I can wrap my mind around sometimes.

I have a board full of lovely women unified by music. These women have taught me to see the joy in life. I don't believe any of us fit a mold. Some of us are nerds, perhaps. I feel completely at home amongst them, something I have very rarely felt with other women and only in brief moments. With these girls I feel at home always. We encourage each other and root each other on. They are like the family I wish I had. They've given me back the childhood stolen from me by abusive relatives and dared me to dream again, to laugh and play.

I have writers in my life. Amazing expressive souls who encourage me and provide me a place in their world. One of which took the time to email with me, answer some questions. A dialog I still think on to this day and gained much from. Another which has begun an online friendship with me. He's one of those people who has an odd sunshine effect on my demeanor. He's also very encouraging and sees me as "strong." A word I have never before associated with myself.

The thread that runs amongst these people is that they are all very unique, caring individuals. It could be said that everyone has something about them that makes them special. But, I don't believe that to be true. Some people just fucking suck quite frankly. The best people in life just don't fit in boxes. These people direct us and put our focus on what is real. When all is dark we have lost sight of what is true. Our memory has slipped. People who accept us help put us back in place. Through them we realize we're worth caring about and dare we say it pretty neat.

Thank you to all the accepting wonderful people in my life. I am so happy to have met you.